MOTHER IN LAW AND DAUHTER IN LAW RELATIONS

 

 

 

 Set limits as a couple with your mother-in-law

Talk to your husband that our new relation has started and this affect existing relation of your family. As a wife now I am basic responsibility of you and your mother has to take new role. She has to back off. You husband may not understand immediately it will take some days, weeks or some months but finally has to admit this reality. After realization of this fact same reality should be conveyed to his mother. Its no easy but we don’t deny the reality. Family relation starts changing after marriage all family members should admit this reality.

2. Put yourself in your mother-in-law’s shoes

If you feel that things are not going in right way and your relations with your mother in law are not healthy, misconceptions exist in this relations it’s most likely that she was never really able to let her son go

If she hasn’t appropriately let go of her son, then she is unable to treat you are a new and vital addition to the family. It’s possible she feels intimidated and threatened by you.  

So when wife can put herself in her shoes, she can better understand why she was that way. Relationship with his son is much closed as she spent  more than half  life to take care and fulfillment of his children wishes. Naturally she is close to her son because she brought up him and turns no stone to fulfill his countless wishes and she won’t to give ownership of son to other person easily. Burt with passage of time some relation become strength and some relation has to go one step back. In all situations as a wife you must act wisely.

At this time you must give mother in law a good supervisory role, realize her that she is good source of guidance. In laundering you must take advice from her, in kitchen ask her which meal should be cooked today and how much quantity is necessary for whole family needs. In this way she will feel that I was best choice of my son as wife

This sort of sounds certainly stroking her ego, but  if you feel that  would probably never change it is necessary to open path by keeping  due  respect which she deserve..

But when boundaries are being crossed, that’s where you have to put your foot down and stand up for yourself.

Have grace, patience, and understanding for your mother-in-law

 It should be realized that all things will take time to set in its position. It may take few months or some years. To settle down the situation you must take continuous advice from your husband and also share your efforts which are you doing to strengthen relation with his mother.

4. Explain to your husband how you feel

One thing must be understand that  that single person cannot  be changed the situation solely .As a wife you must involve your husband as said earlier take continues advice from your husband and convey your efforts which you done for betterment of family and to maintain happy environment. After marriage you husband role is as middle man his inclining to any side may worsen the situation. It is necessary the troika of family (Husband, wife, mother-in- law) must recognize  their new role and act accordingly.

Set the priorities

Ii important to set priorities in your marriage life. Your husband is vital person for you .Therefor must take extra care for his relaxation and extend support to ease his activities. Secondly your children have significant status in your life. You must attend them on priority basis and avoiding other things. Thirdly your mother in law play significant role in your marriage life. You must give due respect to her and take advice in every matter whether it is not important. In this way your mother in law will be of the view that still she has upper hand on son and his family. As her ownership feeling can be crushed in few days or months.

Conclusion

Finally this relation (mother in law and daughter in law) is very complex .there is no single key to maintain this relation harmonized. The essence to maintain this relation good, healthier and meaningful   is the realization of every member about its new role. This role sometimes  demand from one person  sacrifice,or demand from  other  person wisdom and from third person obedience,thus mixture of all factor create good and healthy family environment.